Scene VI.

The Way of the World

by William Congreve

FAINALL, LADY WISHFORT, MRS. MARWOOD.

LADY WISHFORT
Ay, ay, I do not doubt it, dear Marwood. No,
no, I do not doubt it.

FAINALL
Well, madam, I have suffered myself to be overcome
by the importunity of this lady, your friend, and am content you
shall enjoy your own proper estate during life, on condition you
oblige yourself never to marry, under such penalty as I think
convenient.

LADY WISHFORT
Never to marry?

FAINALL
No more Sir Rowlands,--the next imposture may not be
so timely detected.

MRS. MARWOOD
That condition, I dare answer, my lady will
consent to, without difficulty; she has already but too much
experienced the perfidiousness of men. Besides, madam, when we
retire to our pastoral solitude, we shall bid adieu to all other
thoughts.

LADY WISHFORT
Ay, that's true; but in case of necessity, as
of health, or some such emergency -

FAINALL
Oh, if you are prescribed marriage, you shall be
considered; I will only reserve to myself the power to choose for
you. If your physic be wholesome, it matters not who is your
apothecary. Next, my wife shall settle on me the remainder of her
fortune, not made over already; and for her maintenance depend
entirely on my discretion.

LADY WISHFORT
This is most inhumanly savage: exceeding the
barbarity of a Muscovite husband.

FAINALL
I learned it from his Czarish Majesty's retinue, in
a winter evening's conference over brandy and pepper, amongst other
secrets of matrimony and policy, as they are at present practised in
the northern hemisphere. But this must be agreed unto, and that
positively. Lastly, I will be endowed, in right of my wife, with
that six thousand pound, which is the moiety of Mrs. Millamant's
fortune in your possession, and which she has forfeited (as will
appear by the last will and testament of your deceased husband, Sir
Jonathan Wishfort) by her disobedience in contracting herself against
your consent or knowledge, and by refusing the offered match with Sir
Wilfull Witwoud, which you, like a careful aunt, had provided for
her.

LADY WISHFORT
My nephew was NON COMPOS, and could not make
his addresses.

FAINALL
I come to make demands--I'll hear no objections.

LADY WISHFORT
You will grant me time to consider?

FAINALL
Yes, while the instrument is drawing, to which you
must set your hand till more sufficient deeds can be perfected:
which I will take care shall be done with all possible speed. In the
meanwhile I will go for the said instrument, and till my return you
may balance this matter in your own discretion.