17. The Nine Tiny Piglets

Dorothy and the Wizard in Oz

by L. Frank Baum

After breakfast Ozma announced that she had ordered a holiday to
be observed throughout the Emerald City, in honor of her visitors.
The people had learned that their old Wizard had returned to them and
all were anxious to see him again, for he had always been a rare
favorite. So first there was to be a grand procession through the
streets, after which the little old man was requested to perform some
of his wizardries in the great Throne Room of the palace. In the
afternoon there were to be games and races.

The procession was very imposing. First came the Imperial
Cornet Band of Oz, dressed in emerald velvet uniforms with slashes of
pea-green satin and buttons of immense cut emeralds. They played the
National air called "The Oz Spangled Banner," and behind them were
the standard bearers with the Royal flag. This flag was divided into
four quarters, one being colored sky-blue, another pink, a third
lavender and a fourth white. In the center was a large emerald-green
star, and all over the four quarters were sewn spangles that
glittered beautifully in the sunshine. The colors represented the
four countries of Oz, and the green star the Emerald City.

Just behind the royal standard-bearers came the Princess Ozma in
her royal chariot, which was of gold encrusted with emeralds and
diamonds set in exquisite designs. The chariot was drawn on this
occasion by the Cowardly Lion and the Hungry Tiger, who were
decorated with immense pink and blue bows. In the chariot rode Ozma
and Dorothy, the former in splendid raiment and wearing her royal
coronet, while the little Kansas girl wore around her waist the Magic
Belt she had once captured from the Nome King.

Following the chariot came the Scarecrow mounted on the
Sawhorse, and the people cheered him almost as loudly as they did
their lovely Ruler. Behind him stalked with regular, jerky steps,
the famous machine-man called Tik-tok, who had been wound up by
Dorothy for the occasion. Tik-tok moved by clockwork, and was made
all of burnished copper. He really belonged to the Kansas girl, who
had much respect for his thoughts after they had been properly wound
and set going; but as the copper man would be useless in any place
but a fairy country Dorothy had left him in charge of Ozma, who saw
that he was suitably cared for.

There followed another band after this, which was called the
Royal Court Band, because the members all lived in the palace. They
wore white uniforms with real diamond buttons and played "What is Oz
without Ozma" very sweetly.

Then came Professor Woggle-Bug, with a group of students from
the Royal College of Scientific Athletics. The boys wore long hair
and striped sweaters and yelled their college yell every other step
they took, to the great satisfaction of the populace, which was glad
to have this evidence that their lungs were in good condition.

The brilliantly polished Tin Woodman marched next, at the head
of the Royal Army of Oz which consisted of twenty-eight officers,
from Generals down to Captains. There were no privates in the army
because all were so courageous and skillful that they had been
promoted one by one until there were no privates left. Jim and the
buggy followed, the old cab-horse being driven by Zeb while the
Wizard stood up on the seat and bowed his bald head right and left in
answer to the cheers of the people, who crowded thick about him.

Taken altogether the procession was a grand success, and when it
had returned to the palace the citizens crowded into the great Throne
Room to see the Wizard perform his tricks.

The first thing the little humbug did was to produce a tiny
white piglet from underneath his hat and pretend to pull it apart,
making two. This act he repeated until all of the nine tiny piglets
were visible, and they were so glad to get out of his pocket that
they ran around in a very lively manner. The pretty little creatures
would have been a novelty anywhere, so the people were as amazed and
delighted at their appearance as even the Wizard could have desired.
When he had made them all disappear again Ozma declared she was sorry
they were gone, for she wanted one of them to pet and play with. So
the Wizard pretended to take one of the piglets out of the hair of
the Princess (while really he slyly took it from his inside pocket)
and Ozma smiled joyously as the creature nestled in her arms, and she
promised to have an emerald collar made for its fat neck and to keep
the little squealer always at hand to amuse her.

Afterward it was noticed that the Wizard always performed his
famous trick with eight piglets, but it seemed to please the people
just as well as if there had been nine of them.

In his little room back of the Throne Room the Wizard had found
a lot of things he had left behind him when he went away in the
balloon, for no one had occupied the apartment in his absence. There
was enough material there to enable him to prepare several new tricks
which he had learned from some of the jugglers in the circus, and he
had passed part of the night in getting them ready. So he followed
the trick of the nine tiny piglets with several other wonderful feats
that greatly delighted his audience and the people did not seem to
care a bit whether the little man was a humbug Wizard or not, so long
as he succeeded in amusing them. They applauded all his tricks and
at the end of the performance begged him earnestly not to go away
again and leave them.

"In that case," said the little man, gravely, "I will cancel all
of my engagements before the crowned heads of Europe and America and
devote myself to the people of Oz, for I love you all so well that I
can deny you nothing."

After the people had been dismissed with this promise our
friends joined Princess Ozma at an elaborate luncheon in the palace,
where even the Tiger and the Lion were sumptuously fed and Jim the
Cab-horse ate his oatmeal out of a golden bowl with seven rows of
rubies, sapphires and diamonds set around the rim of it.

In the afternoon they all went to a great field outside the city
gates where the games were to be held. There was a beautiful canopy
for Ozma and her guests to sit under and watch the people run races
and jump and wrestle. You may be sure the folks of Oz did their best
with such a distinguished company watching them, and finally Zeb
offered to wrestle with a little Munchkin who seemed to be the
champion. In appearance he was twice as old as Zeb, for he had long
pointed whiskers and wore a peaked hat with little bells all around
the brim of it, which tinkled gaily as he moved. But although the
Munchkin was hardly tall enough to come to Zeb's shoulder he was so
strong and clever that he laid the boy three times on his back with
apparent ease.

Zeb was greatly astonished at his defeat, and when the pretty
Princess joined her people in laughing at him he proposed a
boxing-match with the Munchkin, to which the little Ozite readily
agreed. But the first time that Zeb managed to give him a sharp box
on the ears the Munchkin sat down upon the ground and cried until the
tears ran down his whiskers, because he had been hurt. This made Zeb
laugh, in turn, and the boy felt comforted to find that Ozma laughed
as merrily at her weeping subject as she had at him.

Just then the Scarecrow proposed a race between the Sawhorse and
the Cab-horse; and although all the others were delighted at the
suggestion the Sawhorse drew back, saying:

"Such a race would not be fair."

"Of course not," added Jim, with a touch of scorn; "those little
wooden legs of yours are not half as long as my own."

"It isn't that," said the Sawhorse, modestly; "but I never tire,
and you do."

"Bah!" cried Jim, looking with great disdain at the other; "do
you imagine for an instant that such a shabby imitation of a horse as
you are can run as fast as I?"

"I don't know, I'm sure," replied the Sawhorse.

"That is what we are trying to find out," remarked the
Scarecrow. "The object of a race is to see who can win it--or at
least that is what my excellent brains think."

"Once, when I was young," said Jim, "I was a race horse, and
defeated all who dared run against me. I was born in Kentucky, you
know, where all the best and most aristocratic horses come from."

"But you're old, now, Jim," suggested Zeb.

"Old! Why, I feel like a colt today," replied Jim. "I only
wish there was a real horse here for me to race with. I'd show the
people a fine sight, I can tell you."

"Then why not race with the Sawhorse?" enquired the
Scarecrow.

"He's afraid," said Jim.

"Oh, no," answered the Sawhorse. "I merely said it wasn't fair.
But if my friend the Real Horse is willing to undertake the race I
am quite ready."

So they unharnessed Jim and took the saddle off the Sawhorse,
and the two queerly matched animals were stood side by side for the
start.

"When I say 'Go!'" Zeb called to them, "you must dig out and
race until you reach those three trees you see over yonder. Then
circle 'round them and come back again. The first one that passes
the place where the Princess sits shall be named the winner. Are you
ready?"

"I suppose I ought to give the wooden dummy a good start of me,"
growled Jim.

"Never mind that," said the Sawhorse. "I'll do the best I
can."

"Go!" cried Zeb; and at the word the two horses leaped forward
and the race was begun.

Jim's big hoofs pounded away at a great rate, and although he
did not look very graceful he ran in a way to do credit to his
Kentucky breeding. But the Sawhorse was swifter than the wind. Its
wooden legs moved so fast that their twinkling could scarcely be
seen, and although so much smaller than the cab-horse it covered the
ground much faster. Before they had reached the trees the Sawhorse
was far ahead, and the wooden animal returned to the starting place
as was being lustily cheered by the Ozites before Jim came panting up
to the canopy where the Princess and her friends were seated.

I am sorry to record the fact that Jim was not only ashamed of
his defeat but for a moment lost control of his temper. As he looked
at the comical face of the Sawhorse he imagined that the creature was
laughing at him; so in a fit of unreasonable anger he turned around
and made a vicious kick that sent his rival tumbling head over heels
upon the ground, and broke off one of its legs and its left ear.

An instant later the Tiger crouched and launched its huge body
through the air swift and resistless as a ball from a cannon. The
beast struck Jim full on his shoulder and sent the astonished
cab-horse rolling over and over, amid shouts of delight from the
spectators, who had been horrified by the ungracious act he had been
guilty of.

When Jim came to himself and sat upon his haunches he found the
Cowardly Lion crouched on one side of him and the Hungry Tiger on the
other, and their eyes were glowing like balls of fire.

"I beg your pardon, I'm sure," said Jim, meekly. "I was wrong
to kick the Sawhorse, and I am sorry I became angry at him. He has
won the race, and won it fairly; but what can a horse of flesh do
against a tireless beast of wood?"

Hearing this apology the Tiger and the Lion stopped lashing
their tails and retreated with dignified steps to the side of the
Princess.

"No one must injure one of our friends in our presence," growled
the Lion; and Zeb ran to Jim and whispered that unless he controlled
his temper in the future he would probably be torn to pieces.

Then the Tin Woodman cut a straight and strong limb from a tree
with his gleaming axe and made a new leg and a new ear for the
Sawhorse; and when they had been securely fastened in place Princess
Ozma took the coronet from her own head and placed it upon that of
the winner of the race. Said she:

"My friend, I reward you for your swiftness by proclaiming you
Prince of Horses, whether of wood or of flesh; and hereafter all
other horses--in the Land of Oz, at least--must be considered
imitations, and you the real Champion of your race."

There was more applause at this, and then Ozma had the jewelled
saddle replaced upon the Sawhorse and herself rode the victor back to
the city at the head of the grand procession.

"I ought to be a fairy," grumbled Jim, as he slowly drew the
buggy home; "for to be just an ordinary horse in a fairy country is
to be of no account whatever. It's no place for us, Zeb."

"It's lucky we got here, though," said the boy; and Jim thought
of the dark cave, and agreed with him.